Sunday, April 15, 2018

Yesterday, Today's Memories

They were twenty four,
sixteen left and we still here
going through the motions
that will keep us alive

We will go the bedroom
which is still intact, and look at it
intensively, pensively with
tears in our eyes, and think
I can remember when he was
just a little kid and painted on the wall
and with sad laughter we will,
remember them

In the bathroom the toothbrush
remains, the shampoo now untouched
the bar soap still, the curtain with the fish
hanging on the rod
our hand will touch it trying to feel
that someone that is no longer there,
with tears in our eyes we will think
how silly, and sadly smile

We will go to the garage
but will not open the door,
afraid to see the hockey sticks
lined up neatly in a row
ready to go

The hockey skates will be hanging
on that nail along with the rest,
the equipment bag so stinky,
and, we will remember
how we told them
just wash it man!

When we to go the arena
to cheers others
we will have tears in our eyes
go Humboldt Broncos go! We will yell
but no one will hear us,
with that deep knot on our throats
cutting at the edges
slicing us like a knife
ever so slowly, remembering
that they are no longer here,
and, we'll sink in our seats
our heads hanging by a thread
hoping to see her fixing bodies
and him scoring goals

Yesterday will be today's memories,
as we flip through the photo album
of when she was a cheerful child
full of life;
and he was only beginning to skate 
and trying to stop the pucks
coming into the net, 
even at only three
he was a champion we will think,
with tears in our eyes
and we will shake our heads,
and wondering - How this all happened?

We will sink in our beds
trying to comfort one another,
but only briefly we will feel better
as the absence of that person
that we loved once is no longer here
We will blame ourselves
but there is no need, why should we?
After all he wanted to play hockey,
and she wanted to mend the broken muscles
they died doing what they loved
Yeah, that's what we will say
trying to make ourselves feel better

But no, yesterday, today's memories
we will move on with our eyes focus straight ahead
and our memories in the past
because that is all we have now
we will never get over it, no one ever will

We were lucky to have have them
we will think but no, not true
with tears in our eyes
and semi-smiles on our faces
we will comfort one another
trying to make sense of the senseless
trying to comprehend
and think today about yesterday

Go Broncos go! We will yell
but no one will hear us,
with that deep knot on our throats
cutting at the edges
slicing us like a knife
ever so slowly, remembering
that she and he are no longer here
and we sink in our seats
our heads hanging by a thread
hoping to see her fixing bodies
or him scoring goals

Yesterday is all we have left
and will fondly and lovely
remember today what happened
at Thanksgiving or the playoffs,
who scored what goal
and that save that make our
goalie number one,
and our team victorious

Yesterday, today's memories

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